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As General Conference rapidly approaches, I thought it an appropriate time to break my back-to-school radio silence with a preparation checklist for every Mormon’s semiannual favorite weekend. You’ve got one week folks! And I’ve got the list to get you all spiritually pumped and primed.

conference center

Step One – Supplies

The most important step. Without good food this is basically just a boring TV marathon of old dudes. Old dudes we love, of course. The point is that food is necessary if you’re in the living room for 48 hours.

Consult your ward Relief Society President’s Pinterest boards for the following recipes:

1 Fall-themed Crock Pot meal – preferably a stew, chili or soup

1 Authentic Pioneer bread recipe **BONUS for grinding your own meal**

1 Funeral Potatoes recipe because you’re not a Mormon if you don’t make it this weekend

2 Pumpkin-flavored desserts or do you even care that it’s fall you ungrateful Gentile?

 

Carefully add those recipe ingredients to this grocery list and get to your local supermarket before Friday night or good luck be to you:

-Fruit Snacks (whether you have kids or not)

-Caffeine-Free Beverages

-Your chosen flavor of M&Ms

-Box of tissues for when President Eyring speaks

-Box of tissues for when Elder Scott tells stories about his wife

-Paper/Notebooks for the notetaking you fully intend to do

 

Step Two – Set up your Viewing Station

  • Clean your living room, bedroom, kitchen or wherever you will be watching
  • Charge electronic devices and have chargers available and accessible
  • Assemble treat dishes, tissues, scriptures, notebooks, journals, pens and Legos for the kids/undergrown husbands
  • Remove all pillows and blankets if you are a true, good Mormon who intends to stay awake for all 8 conference hours

 

Step Three – Spiritually Prepare

  • Read April Conference Talks, your patriarchal blessing, attend the temple if possible and pray about questions/concerns
  • Check out the #ldsgenconf on Twitter to bone up on being a modern media missionary
  • Learn a few German terms for planes and aeronautics since The Silver Fox may be gracing us with his native language this year
  • Submit your predictions for this session of conference via our Cultural Hall Twitter hashtag #LDSConfPredictions

conference center

 

We wish you and yours a very spiritual and amazing weekend next week! Don’t forget to tune in (for all 5 sessions! Yes, I’m counting Priesthood ladies, if you are so inclined.) Find ways to watch live here.

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