So, it being Valentine’s Day and everything, I thought I would share some thoughts on love, which I obviously know loads about being the young, single, never really had a “serious” (whatever that means) romantic relationship adult that I am. My thoughts are directed towards my fellow singles and how we too can feel the love.
- You’re not lesser. Sure, you may be relegated to the kid table at family get-togethers even though you’re 35, but you are just as much a person as your younger married cousin. Every soul is great in the sight of God, even us single ones.
- Love is more than sex. At least, I think so. Not that I’ve had sex to really know, but I feel like love is something bigger than just physical attraction and sex. That’s definitely a part of it for lots of people, but there’s more to it than that. Also, you sleep better alone than with someone else and that’s science.
- Lift where you stand. I think that most of us could benefit from understanding that we should “lift where we stand.” Since I’m not married and marriage is a big f-ing deal for us Mormons, I think marital status can be taken into account for determining the “where.” Single people can do basically everything that married people can do, even in the Church, so don’t worry about what you can’t do and focus on what you can.
- Do something. Related to #3, but more about empowering yourself. You are in control of who you are. Yes, some parts of love are outside your control. I don’t know of love potions yet that can force people to love you, so you just do what you can. This is my be like Speed Racer section. There’s a point in the glorious, cotton-candy of a film where Speed Racer is trying to stop the villain and is talking with his dad, who tells him that racing can’t change the world and Speed responds, “Maybe not, but it’s all I know how to do and I’ve gotta do something.” I dig that. I frequently think to myself that doing something is useless because it won’t change anything, but when I choose to act, I feel better.
- Find the Love. Share the Love. Feel the Love. I think we can get too hung up on ‘romantic love’ as the highest, end all, be all form of love. I think that’s a bunch of balderdash, hogwash, and poppycock. Maybe because I don’t have it and am just bitter or something. Yet, I think we do a huge disservice to the idea of love when we discount the possibility for love among friends—not like a ‘friends with benefits’ sort of thing (but hey, whatever floats your boat), but in a we truly care about each other and feel love, but don’t feel the need to get hitched and have sex to express that love. We are commanded to love our neighbor (aka everyone) as ourselves, so there seems to be plenty of love to go around and I don’t think Jesus wanted us to go carousing and having sex with everyone we know or saw, but maybe that’s just me.
I can definitely do better about embracing the love that I do have and trying to develop other relationships with whatever is in my control. Maybe you can to. It’s even been said that love is all we need.
P.S. I want to know what love is and could you please find me somebody to love? I mean, I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that because you can’t buy me love since this ain’t the summer of love, which is a building on fire.